i'm very tired. yesterday i thought i had a great plan: go to bed early. unfortunately it didn't work, as i couldn't fall asleep. i'll give the plan another try today, and hope that it will work better this time. i'm so tired it hurts when i get up in the mornings... while i was trying to fall asleep yesterday i had a short moment of that understanding of how small and insignificant i really am. i so easily forget that, and begin to think that i'm the middle of the world and that my problems are big and important. but sometimes i get that understanding of how small i am, and that it really doesn't matter whether i'm happy or not. and as my happines/unhappines doesn't matter, there's really no point in being unhappy. yesterday it only lasted for less than a second, but the effects lasted maybe 15 minutes. normally i get that feeling when i watch the northern lights, or when the sky is clear and full of stars, and then it lasts much longer. but i haven't been able to see the sky at all for a long time now, because it's so cloudy.

today i went to the police station to get a new passport, as i noticed that the old one expires this month. we haven't decided where to go on our vacation yet, but my boss told me today that it's ok for me to take two weeks off. yippi! we were a bit interested in going to india, but we would need a visa for that, and according to the indian embassy getting a visa normally takes 5 days, but sometimes it takes 3 weeks, and sometimes it takes a few months... so we thought it might be safer to go somewhere where you don't need a visa.

we had visitors from härjedalen at work today. they were interested in seeing how we work, so that we can cooperate better in the future. i got to take care of one of them before lunch, letting her see what i do for a living. normally i would have been nervous, but as i'm so tired i didn't have the energy to be nervous until it was allready over. unfortunately i'm afraid i wasn't too friendly and welcoming... i answered her questions when she had any, and i didn't say anything mean to her, but i felt that i could have been nicer and more interested... i just didn't have the energy. i'm feeling quite bad about that... fortunately i wasn't the only one she met during her visit, and the others might have given a better impression.

my best friend/colleague gave me a coca cola after lunch today. that was really nice. i didn't even ask for one. people can be so sweet sometimes :)  ¶ 7:49 PM